So the temptation is to think that you need to learn how to become fearless in order to get unstuck.
Fear is part of the human state. It is normal to feel fear. In some situations fear is very useful.
For example, fear will make you stop and check things out before leaping into the unknown unprepared. It will make you check and assess the risk before taking action. All healthy stuff.
Fear has a positive role to play as well as being a natural part of the human state. So focusing on becoming fearless isn’t necessary or appropriate.
However, fear becomes a problem when we let it get such a vice like grip on us that it keeps us stuck and stops us from taking action.
That is why it is important to learn effective ways of managing fear. But that on its own isn’t enough to kick fear into touch.
Let’s imagine you have learnt effective ways to stop fear keeping you stuck. You have put all your new fear fighting skills into action.
But chances are you are still feeling some fear.
When you are about to do something new, make a big change or shoot for a bigger goal, you are stepping out into the unknown. Something you haven’t experienced before. You are stepping outside your comfort zone. And that feels scary. Even when you are well prepared.
The thing to do is not just focus on the fear.
Focus on fostering courage as well.
- Yes, learn what you need to do to manage your fear.
- Yes, put things in place to reduce risk to manage your fear.
- Yes, focus on what you need to do set yourself up to succeed.
- Ask yourself “What needs to happen for me to feel safe to move forward, despite the fear?
But when you have done all of this, it is time for courage to look fear squarely in the eyes and say:
“Step aside because I am coming through.”
Work on ways you can be more courageous, not fearless. The first will move you forward. The second is a state that doesn’t exist.
Think of fear like “The Force” in Star Wars. There is a dark side to it. And there is the good side.
The dark side is the side that keeps you stuck and not taking action. The good side is where dealing with fear and courage stand shoulder to shoulder ready to beat the crap out of the dark side.
So my friends, may the force be with you as you deal with your fears and foster courage to move past it.